Paris Hilton Adds a New Dimension to Presidential Campaigning

Who would have thought that none other than blonde bombshell Paris Hilton, who heretofore has been punned and panned for lack of intelligence, should come up with the most intelligent and easiest-to-watch video of the entire campaign? Not only that, she skillfully read her script and came up with a better energy policy, so to speak, than any offered by the two leading candidates. And, of course, she carefully planned her video so that no one, males at least, could take their eyes off of her while she was campaigning. Certainly much, much better than Dukakis riding the tank or the treacherous swiftboating disaster last time. I would like to know the total of minutes used on all the media for this excellent campaign video, as well as the total number of times it has been run. We are finally seeing some light to this never ending jawboning, name calling, patriotism challenging, pledge of allegiance oversights, volunteering one's potential first lady for a somewhat, shall we say, risque event at the highly cultural Sturgis Harley rally. We need more Paris Hilton campaign videos elucidating the other principal policy areas and topics of dispute so we will know, finally, just exactly what is going on.