Canada has announced that it is doing away with the penny, which costs more than one cent to make. So, rather than subsidize pennies, all transactions will be rounded up or down to the nearest nickle. What if this decision is made here in the US of A? We will have to change many things, including:
- The cost of a thought will rise from a penny to a nickle. Instead of saying "a penny for your thoughts", we will have to gt used to saying a nickle for your thoughts.
- No more pennies will fall from heaven. Instead of pennies from heaven, we will have nickles from heaven.
- No more penny ante. Nickle ante will take its place.
- Not worth a red cent will become not worth a red nickle.
- Penny pinchers will become nickle pinchers.
- Ben Franklin will have to arise and rephrase "a penny saved is a penny earned" to "a nickle saved is a nickle earned."
- Henny Penny will become Henny Nickle.
- Little girls will have to be named Nickle, instead of Penny.
And you can probably think of other drastic changes to our lore, culture, and everyday language. So, hoard your pennies. Penny collections may become as rare as $2 bills unless our productive Congress decides to forestall the end of pennies and continue to produce them as a public service and as a means of preserving tradition. A Lincoln Nickle? Who ever heard of such a thing?
