The Curmudgeonly Professor

The Curmudgeonly Professor Makes Banana Bread

Since a half dozen over ripe bananas reposed on the kitchen counter, I decided it was time to make banana bread.  I checked out a couple of dozen recipes on Allrecipes.com, and settled on the one at this link.  So easy even a curmudgeonly professor and incompetent cook could make it.  And it turned out extremely well.   Cooking is a breeze.  It's the cleaning up that bugs me.  Go here for the recipe:Banana bread

The Curmudgeonly Professor's Recipe Recommendation for March 29 2012

Here's your recipe to try today: Mama's Asian Chicken and Rice.  Better than orange chicken from the takeout.  Something I'll definitely make again, soon.

The Curmudgeonly Professor Learns How to Cook

Before my wife began having health problems which limited her mobility, my cooking expertise was limited to opening a can of Campbell's Soup, which I learned how to do in college, boiling some oat meal, or frying an egg.  Then I had to begin figuring out what to have for supper every day, so I started studying recipes and experimenting with a variety of possibilities.  For years I bought recipe books and gave them to my wife, which she rarely ever looked at.  I kept buying them and reading them myself, since I found that was a fun and interesting thing to do.  But I never tried to cook anything.  Until now.  

Actually I have learned a great deal about cooking, mainly that it is something more than looking at savory color pictures in a beautiful cookbook.  Yes, cooking, I learned, requires getting a whole bunch of ingredients, messing up the kitchen, dirtying pans, measuring cups, spilling on the stove and in the oven.   Then after spending two hours preparing a dish that the cookbook says you can prepare in 15 minutes, it takes about ten minutes to eat it, and then another two hours to clean up the mess.  My wife never complained about doing all this, even when we had five kids at home.  Apparently, I thought, she really likes to do all this work.  But, to my surprise, I have discovered that she really hates to cook any more, and that all other retired women her age are in a conspiracy where they all hate to cook.  Men are left in jeapordy unless they learn how to do something besides spread peanut butter.

If I could cook like Rachel Ray where, I am sure, some one else pre measures all the stuff in little bowls, so all she has to do is dump them together, and then clean up the mess, cooking would be a lark.  As it is, I am actually having some fun hunting up recipes and trying them out.  Thus, the Curmudgeonly Professor is adding a cooking component to his blog.

Here is my latest successful recipe: banana crumb muffins from allrecipes.com.  Fantastic.  The recipe says you can prep the recipe in 15 minutes.  Took me more like an hour, but what do I know about cooking except you measure stuff, stir together, mix it, and then boil, fry, bake, or nuke?  I think these recipes are copyrighted so I don't want to copy the recipe here, so look it up on allrecipes.com if you have a batch of overripe bananas.  Oh, and I learned that when you thaw frozen bananas, you have a bunch of slimy bananas.  But they make wonderful muffins.

A Thanksgiving Turkey That Didn't Get a Presidential Pardon

Before

After

Check out the Pioneer Woman Blog

If you've missed my previous encouraging remarks about checking the Pioneer Woman blog linked at the right, take a few minutes and take a look at it.  Pioneer Woman (she is married to Marlboro Man) has done a remarkable job of juggling multiple topics.  Besides, her cookbook, which I recently bought is a treasure trove of fun, photos, and recipes.

Recipe for Game Day Chili

Having successfully made tomato soup from the aforementioned and referenced recipe, I ventured forth this morning and made Game Day Chili from another About.com recipe, linked here. I used only 2 pounds of hamburger, but the same ingredients otherwise as recommended. This may be the conclusion of my culinary adventures. One can only step outside one's comfort zone for a limited time before the strain becomes too much and we then revert to standard form. So for those who have no idea what to fix to eat, you now have excellent tomato soup (by the way, shredded parmesan instead of grated works really well), and game day chili.

Tomato Soup Recipe

When informed that I was making tomato soup for dinner tonight, I was requested to post the recipe, since this event was such a miraculous occurrence. Here is the link to the copyrighted recipe at About.com. I put in a lot more celery and onion than a quarter of a cup, more like 3/4 of a cup of each. Turned out extremely well. I now have three items on my cooking repertoire. I'll make this again since I know how to do it now.

French Toast Perfection

Here's Valerie Phillips's take on perfection in French toast from today's Deseret News. I have become a loyal supporter of her in her attempt to preserve her job as food editor at the DesNews. So read up on French toast and check her other articles. Check the link here. The Curmudgeonly Professor may even check out her ratio of eggs to milk. Up to now, he just breaks an egg or two, pours in a little milk, a dose of vanilla, some pepper and sees how things turn out.

Support Valerie Phillips on Desnews.com

I received the following email from Valerie Phillips of the food section of the Deseret News. I have read and enjoyed Ms. Phillips' writing and columns, and have quoted some of them on this blog. I encourage blog readers to click merrily away on the Desnews.com food section on its website to try and salvage the food section. I knew the Deseret News was hurting, but 35 employees is a disaster. I also urge you to follow her new blog which she outlines in the email she sent me today. We wish Valerie Phillips well. Her new blog, Flavors, should be a success and I'm sure you will enjoy it.

To friends and Food section readers:
Hi. Many of you have heard that the Deseret News is going to lay off 35 people in the next couple of weeks. Many of you have expressed concern that there won't be a Food section.
The short answer is, I don't know yet what will happen.
The long answer is, I do know when other newspapers across the country have downsized, their Features section takes a hit. And, there is some thought that a local-oriented Food section can be replaced easily with Associated Press "wire copy."
But I also know that that our management is paying close attention to what readers seem to want. One barometer that they feel is important is how many "hits" a story or section gets on our Web site, Desnews.com. On the morning that a story runs (in the case of Food, that's on Wednesday morning) the editors look to see which stories have gotten the most hits and comments. (To find my stories on the Web site, you can click on Food & Dining.)
Also, I'm starting a food blog called Flavors, and it's supposed to be up and running tomorrow. I'll be including all kinds of newsy food-related tidbits. My first posts will be about the Utah finalist on "The Next Food Network Star," and I hope to get viewers' opinions on how the competition is going. I also want to eventually do a weekly feature on local chefs. (That is, if I'm still here in two weeks). Anyway, you can check it out by clicking on the Blogs section on the Web site.
So, I guess if you want the Food section to continue in some form, I encourage you to read it online, and feel free to express your own opinions and comments!
Thanks,
Valerie Phillips
Deseret News

Comments on Kitchen Gadgets and Home Economics

Out of concern for my readers who may have missed the astute comments of three commenters germane to the troublesome topic of kitchen gadgets and home economics, here they are:

COMMENTS

Makes me want to go shopping for kitchen gadgets....

Posted by: Alfred | May 01, 2008 at 05:00 AM

I do believe you may have hit on something. Build shelves in your garage and collect all of these items from neighbors, friends, and family members. Then you can open a fabulous display and charge admission. That will take you out of retirement, give you tons of social contact and eventually you can have a fantastic garage sale - all of the newly retired folks will gather round for a bargain and you have contributed greatly to the recycling of great and wonderful things.

Posted by: Ann | April 18, 2008 at 10:55 AM

Ah, infomercials are the culprits. Last summer, when I was recovering from a bout with kidney failure, I was often asked by my dear husband, "What shall I fix for supper...lunch...etc." I had no appetite, and couldn't have cared less what he fixed. However, I did watch quite a bit of tv, and saw an informercial for a little gizmo called a GT XPress 101, which even sends you cookbooks along with the outfit. (In fact, because I called the 101 number, I actually got two of these things.) You can make 2 wonderful omelets in 7 minutes without stressing about getting the edges even, flipping it over, etc. But, most of the time, it stands in it's little place in the slide-out drawer. Ah, me. Not consigned yet to the basement where the Ronco rotisserie resides.

Posted by: Elizabeth | April 17, 2008 at 09:31 PM

Lessons in Cooking, Home Economics, and Kitchen Gadgets

In 1952, the Curmudgeonly Professor, who was a mere 20 year old college senior about to enter the perils of holy matrimony, bought his young 19 year old bride-to-be a Betty Crocker cookbook, having collected a few minor doubts that his mother-in-law-to-be had taught his bride-to-be much about boiling water and cooking gourmet meals. He did not know that this volume of the cookbook would become "the classic Betty Crocker cookbook." So when Rodale Press issued a reprint of it, naturally my wife ordered it, since the original was tattered and fell apart decades ago and she had such fond memories of that particular cookbook. The Rodale guy called this morning to ask her how she liked it, to which I explained that she doesn't like to cook, period, any more and just wanted it for a keepsake to remind her of how much joy she experienced when cooking for five kids and a husband for decades. She, in fact, admits that she hasn't used it yet. So the Rodale guy said he was sending a review copy of a cookbook for two people that my wife could return in three weeks if she didn't like it, and he hoped that would rejuvenate her interest in cooking. Fat chance.

The Curmudgeonly Professor has written an earlier post advising men not to buy their wives a Vita-Mix or, for that matter, a pressure cooker, a bread maker, a popcorn popper, a Ronco rotisserie, or, for that matter, any other modern cooking gadget or convenience. I reissue this warning, in case some of you about-to-be retirees, or you who are already retirees, do not get suckered into this temptation. Do not watch the rotisserie infomercials as a rapt audience recites in unison every two or three minutes, "Set it and Forget it." Do not watch the demonstrator remove luscious slabs of ribs, hunks of luscious salmon, and golden roasted fowl before your very eyes. The only reason to buy any of this stuff is if you plan to use it yourself. I have not met a retired female in the last eight years who testified that she "just loved to look up new recipes and cook gourmet meals for their dear husband," or that she "just loved to get out her rotisserie and heat up her kitchen and spend an hour cleaning it up and putting it away." As for pressure cookers, my wife's logic is as follows: "Why do you care if you can make split pea soup in a few minutes when we don't have anything else to do all day anyway so why not do it in the crockpot and let it cook for eight hours?"

My wife thinks she is so logical. Can't she see that technological progress dictates that we put stuff in the pressure cooker, turn it on, and have everything come out spectacularly in just a few minutes? That's why the Golden Corral buffet, for example, has a special "seniors" period of the day between about 4 and 6 or so with all kinds of enticing menu items for women who resigned from cooking the day their husbands cleaned out their desk, hauled five banker's boxes of junk home from the office, which, incidentally, are still sitting out in the garage, came in the front door at 3:30 p.m., exactly three hours before the love of your life, at least once upon a time, was supposed to show up, and announced, "Honey, I'm home. Forever. 24/7, sweetheart. By the way, what's for dinner?" "Oh my heck," the victims of the graduates into the social security rolls, say, "Can this really be happening to me?" Actually, since this is a family blog, it is likely that some June Cleavers may even utter a few heartfelt comments a tad saltier than that when they realize their domestic peace, tranquility, privacy, soap operas, and personal freedom have now been banished. "Did I really promise I would love this jerk until death do we part?", she says. "I had no idea when I was 19 or 20 or 25 that marriage really meant "hanging out" together each and every minute of each and every day after retirement.

Oh dear. They never mentioned any of this stuff in olden days when virtually all female high school students had to put on their cute little aprons and make brownies in their home ec classes and then become secretaries, nurses, librarians, or teachers when they finished college. The boys, of course studied vocational agriculture, auto mechanics, welding, and other he-man stuff. Now I notice in my home town of Powell, Wyoming that most of the FFA officers and contest winners are females and the males don't stand a chance. Times have definitely changed. But little progress is observed in the cooking department among retired women.

We would all like to know how many of you who have pressure cookers, Vita-mixes, rotisseries, bread machines, and the like, actually use them, how often you use them, and how many of you have abandoned them to the store room with your exercise bikes, treadmills, and other relics of good intentions. Just wondered.