I just trashed an article on procrastination. Procrastination means going into a trance and ignoring everything you are supposed to do. A whole bunch of it will never need doing anyway or, if it gets done, it will just have to be done over again. So why waste one's time? We are, after all, busy and important people.
But, reluctantly, the Curmudgeonly Professor realized with stunning immediacy today that he had never completed his analysis of the Twelve Days of Christmas. So, in an attempt to rectify this egregious oversight, here are the Eleven Pipers Piping. According to the purists, the eleven pipers represent the eleven faithful apostles. However, we don't want to mix our image of the pear tree, now deteriorated into a mere fragment of its original beauty, infested with turtle doves, calling birds and French hens, all of whom are getting terribly sick of waiting for their roosting period to be over so the hens can go back to France and lay their eggs. The geese are more problematic since they are awfully messy, hanging around the pear tree for 50 days. Someone has pilfered the golden rings and the swans got sick of swimming, the milk maids sued for job discrimination, the ladies dancing were arrested for loud and obnoxious behavior, the leaping Lords all retreated to Downton Abbey where the aristocracy and lords sat around waiting for their valets to dress them for dinner. (pause to change the batteries in my mouse).
Regrettably, The Wizard of Google provided only 95,600 (even) references to eleven pipers piping, giving us a paucity of knowledge and factoids with which to assess the eleventh day of Christmas. Author C. C. Benison wrote a mystery titled "Eleven Pipers Piping: A Father Christmas Mystery" but Amazon wants a hefty $10.69 for the Kindle edition and I am loathe to spend more than 99 cents for a Kindle book, $1.99 if it seems particularly crucial to my knowledge and entertainment. One of the reviewers, however, opined that the plot was "darned tangled" so that definitely ruled out spending $10.69 on the book.
Of greater importance, though, is the fact that you and I have twiddled away 50 days since Chrismas, leaving a mere 315 more days until we have to go through the pear tree and the calling birds one more time. The question is, how much have we accomplished in 50 days? Dang little, if you need my assessment. Since I have been connected inseparably to my iPad, I am reluctant to sit down at my two computers any more and write or edit blogs. Besides, few things are worth photographing in the dead days of winter. Right now, my iPad has run out of gas so I am reluctantly returning to bloviating on my blog while it gets juiced up again. As the LDS hymn says, Do what is right, let the consequence follow. No joke.