I noticed when I went into the garage from the house the other day that a partially empty bag of Marie Callender's Low Fat All Natural Original Restaurant Style Corn Bread Mix that had expired ages ago was reposing several yards away from the trash can. I thought, aha! I have caught my wife in the act! We have a big blue trash can just two or three yards away from the garage door and we stand at the door and toss stuff in the trash can. And she obviously missed.
So in an exultant and happy frame of mind, I said, "Dear, I believe you missed the trash can with Marie Callender." I should have known better. She replied, "But see what I did get in the trash can. A two-liter empty Schweppe's ginger ale bottle. A two-liter empty 7Up bottle. An empty fresh strawberry plastic container. And, above all, I hit the trash can dead on with a partially empty box of stale, moldy, out-of-date by a year, stone ground, whole wheat, 100% natural fig bars. So there!"
At that point, I realized once again that it never pays and I never win when I attempt to argue or make a point with my wife. She is the consummate "glass half full or half empty" twister arounder to serve her purpose. She corrects my exaggerations down to three decimal points when I am just trying to make a point in general terms and I just round off a tad to make the story sound better or to garner more sympathy for my sorry and pathetic situation. General terms don't work for her. Rounding off is a federal crime. Punishable. She wants specifics. Accurate and not misleading specifics.
Just wait though Dear wife. I will catch you at something and then we can score one for your long-suffering husband who has never won a point yet. But next time, I will. For sure. You'll see.